Wednesday, April 10, 2013


My bridesmaid Jessie, who is one of my favorite friends, and I were talking about words a few weeks ago. She is a teacher (and the mother of my flower girl), and she was saying you have to be really mindful of what you say around kids.
I've been thinking about our conversation, and I agree with her (although I have zero knowledge about children), and think it applies to everyone you speak to.
I had a mean boss at my last job. She didn't really do anything to me, most of the poor treatment I received was in the form of things she said. It would stick with me, and I would let it bother me when I wasn't at work.

Then you have people who are the opposite of the devil woman I used to work with. People like my Mom, who's words make you feel good about yourself.

I've put my foot in my mouth more times than I care to count. Experience is a good teacher though, and that is why I try to think about what I say before I say it (I don't always succeed in this). Probably the most embarrassing example I can think of was when I was a waitress in college, and accidently made a mistake concerning someone's gender. I can now say with 100% certainty that unless you for sure know someone's gender, avoid using "sir" and "ma'am".
This is a super nit-picky example, but I know from friends that are adopted that this bothers other people too. I have had several people ask me, "Are you going to invite your real dad to your wedding?" and other nosey questions. I was raised by my Mom (biological), and her second husband (not biological). I know people don't mean to be offensive, but "real parents" isn't exactly the correct terminology if you are speaking to someone who is adopted, or has an unusual family situation like I do.
I was in two long term (several years each) relationships before my fiancé and the "when are y'all getting married?" question used to bother me a lot. Obviously it was a huge blessing that neither of these relationships went any further, but I still remember how much the question stung at the time. I've heard from friends that "when are y'all going to have kids?" can be just as hurtful.
Today is my Friday and Nick's brother is coming in from Chicago to soak up some sweet Southern sunshine. I can't wait!!! Until next time :)


  1. People need to think before they speak! Ugh!


  2. I hear that! I'm adopted and people (well meaning, sure, but still) ask me allll the time if I want to find my "real" parents. My dad adopted me literally minutes after my birth mother dropped me at the hospital, he IS my real dad!!